Usually a long day implies that it was a hard day or just a tiring day.
Today was tiring, but mostly because I woke up that way.
It's about 12:30am so I'm going to make this short and sweet, but I just wanted to write down a realization that I'm having.
When I first got here, I counted. 16 weeks. 16 weeks until I get to go home, until I can say that I did it. That I went out and I tried something new. For a long time, I think that the fact that I could say I went on exchange meant more to me than the exchange itself. It was the bragging rights of it all.
That's changed. And I didn't even realize it had. I counted again today. 13 weeks. But it wasn't 13 weeks until I got to go home, it was more like 13 weeks until I have to go to home. And it wasn't until today that I noticed that the mood of the count had changed.
I know it's only been three weeks, so I'm still a long way off from being officially home here and being settled and feeling like I'm okay where I am. I know better than anyone that things can be great one week and then shitty the next, and of course there was have been struggles here, like not knowing how to make pasta because I can't read Danish instructions and trying to stay in shape and of course beating my head off the floor.
But it's been so long since I've felt like I'm doing something new in my life. Like I've detached myself from my normal routine. It's nice to get a break from my normal life. From the school stresses, the future considerations, the stupid and complicated (or lack thereof) dating life, the ups and downs of friendships, the unpredictable worklife and of course, the sometimes crazy family. It's nice to get away and to feel like I'm someone else. I can't find any other way to describe it. It kind of seems like the problems I had this summer don't really exist anymore, they seem so far away and detached. It's like now that I'm removed from the situation I finally have a clear view.
That's not to say I don't have issues over here that are much the same as they were back home. But they're different and it's like a breath of fresh air.
And this is when I realized, I'm going to miss it here, terribly. I already know that. I'm having an amazing time here and I love all the people I've met and I know this is going to be one of the most memorable experiences of my life, but mostly, I love this hiatus from my normal life. And going back to that life is going to be surreal and weird and tiring.
I'm jealous of the people who get to stay here and I hate remembering that this adventure has an expiry date. Never has the phrase "enjoy every moment" meant more to me than it does during this time. And I'm looking forward to seeing what else Sonderborg and Europe have in store for me.
PS. On a less deep note, Dorm Race (which is like a pub crawl of the dorms) is on Thursday and Cafeen makes its return on Friday. Get ready for tumultuous blog posts. Who knows what kind of shit I'm going to get into this weekend.
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